“What Comes Next” Tanka 2639


(November 26, 2019)

What comes next after

Jaw-Jah is Army-Navy:

not Them Seminoles!

So Sorry, Florida State:

but you do have them Lost ‘Canes*

*(Not really, I just like to tweak my Florida State pals. The ‘Noles be creeping right up there in overalls with Them Gators and soon’s the goons in charge at The Head Shed – why do FSU, USF and, yes UM all seem saddled with former government hacks as college presidents…like as soon as a state senate president or a cabinet official gets their grubbies on the overseen and still watchin’ position on the athletic department, emphasis goes to left-handed lightweight gender-equal-if-not-specific sports mirroring the popular sporting press’ new image of itself? At least Florida’s new head hack only messes with things like insisting Queer Studies stand Statue of (Dis)Liberty in English Department and other extravagances: didn’t any you Bull Gators tell the new boss after Harley-Rider hankered away we gots to get us someone who knows how to throw the ball…oops, you did din’t you? Wonder how many he cost? Now, at UCF where not a hint of tardy-with-rules remains since the football president Trevor Coburn got caught with a purloined petard the big question on campus is what to do with two – or more -starting quarterbacks when the last Golden Wonder gets done with rehabbing that stove wheel and you already got two youngsters lookin’ almost fine. Maybe mount another state legislature-n-senate stink to get Them Gators to go home-n-home (in the same century, perhaps?) with them Go-Knights? Thass a real pickledickament, no? Flor-high-E-Dah, Free-Shoes-Ewe, My-Amby-Rap and now YouCan’tFinish trying to hold off Them gelded Cows with gray skin and a hump highs on the back out TampawayBay and both pretentious-they-hope Florida International and Florida Atlantic hornin’ in on the alumnae check-writers brigade. Better watch out, boys-n-gulls, Stetson may push Them Wildcats and Them Rattlers by Daytona Beach and Tallahassee (and there are some still who recall fondly When The Rabblers had Bullet Bob Hayes takin’ delivery orders from Amos Alonzo Stagg I seem to recall. Watchout Kids: West and SouthWest and North and old Florida Presbyterian (now Southern) might want to cash in some them big booster checks too. Pity the poor Fish and Muggers and KittyCats got only owners to fry. Gave a close acquaint who insists on anonymity – that right, Storm? – who suggests Seminole State College (of Florida so as not to annoy them Tribal Seminoles out in Oklahoma – not the ones where who gave FSU rights to a polka-dot butted horse and an in-period costume student to play Chief Osceola and his happy horse Unconquered, which legend says is the last unbeaten team left the Harmby Hasn’t Beaten Ever…not Naby or even Hair Farce, neither! Y’all be cool. Eye haint damfool enuff to predicticate Them Reptiles by sebenteen. NoSireeeBob!)

Comments are closed.