“Wonder If It’s Canadians Come Crashsing?”


(February 5, 2019)

‘That’ Big Bang* while past

Was a car wreck by the school

Traffic diverted

*(Just before Daytona Beach’s “Speed Weeks” and the closely following Bike Week – with college Spring Break not far behind, even half-a-hundred miles from all the hullabloo there comes to us in Central Florida a time of slow driving as SnowBirds creep along in whichever lane they choose – not to mention our own homegrown rubbernecking slow drivers – and the nearby fire/rescue action picks up pace. Our own version of Halfbacks – those who leave Florida in The Summer – sometimes lasts near nine months – and go perch on some North Carolina mountainside until the mercury crawls back to reasonable climes rarely are at fault. But them Canadians – by which I mean anyone North of the Line drawn by Misters Mason and Dixon (those West of Lake Monroe where the Saint Johns River wends its way North to Jacksonville we call Alabamians. Those North of Lake Monroe we call Georgians – but that’s another bone for contention – we are discussing Canadian drivers) see green plants with leaves and immediately they stall tr4affic in both directions as they oooh and aaah and point and flash their cameras in full daylight with the windows rolled up. If it weren’t for the funny coins they continue to offer our quick-change shop-heres while you gas up and our toll-both highway robbers, we’d have no entertainment ‘tall. But do try to limit the wrecks to one or seven a day? Okay? The traffic diversion down my street meant recycle services and trash pickup well might be delayed if not detained until school lets out and then, boy-oh-boy could we use a cupple Canadiens to slow them dang yellow beast busses down…but no hope for teaching the SUV crowd of entitled parents picking up progeny courtesy or even rules of the road.)

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